If I wrote a book...

what would it be about? I get asked that question a lot. If I knew that surely I would have written my bestseller by now. Oh it will be a bestseller. Why bother otherwise? Of course, the sense of accomplishment would be an added bonus. Fulfilling a dream I've had for a while would make me happy beyond that dream. Ultimately though I want it to be good. I want it to be great. I want it to fly off the shelves and become a classic in my time. These may be the reasons I've not written my book yet. Great expectations and fear of failure.

Bryce Courtenay once told me that the secret to writing a book is 'bum glue'. I paid a lot of Rands to go learn from the Master and the man who made me want to write stories. And that's what I remember most clearly. 'Bum Glue' - worth every cent. Get your ass in a chair, write and do not get up till your fingers are bleeding or you are in danger of developing piles.
I've drifted way off course over the past 2 years. Trying to get back on track with this blog. It's a start but I've got to put in more work. So I'm going to try do just that. You are all the witnesses to my promise to myself. All I ask from you is that you read and I'll take any criticism (and I'm not adverse to a little praise) you have to throw my way.

Sunday Wind Down

Weekend has flown by as usual and don't feel like I've accomplished very much apart from not spending one single penny! Not even one! Easy to do when you don't leave the house!
Most exciting thing that I've done this weekend is watch the Springboks beat the British and Irish Lions! And what a tense game it was! We had a comfortable lead and then all the stars were taken off and the Lions kicked it up to high gear! I spent the last 5 minutes jumping up and down to calm my anxiety! At least I got to burn some calories - but they better not do that to me next week. My heart might not be able to take it!
So heading off to get ready for the week, have a good one chaps!

Why use time constructively when you can watch TV?

I should be blogging. Instead I've watched 2 episodes of Grey's Anatomy (had a cry) and on to my second episode of House. You may recall we were without a TV for a little over a week - fortunately our Sky box recorded my favourites shows. All 2 of them. So I'm playing catch up. I'll catch up with the blogging tomorrow. All things are meant to be equal, are they not? Balance will be restored.

When Alarms don't go off...

it means my day starts very badly. Overslept this morning! I hate that feeling. That panic! That mad rush to get ready and figure out how the hell you are going to make it to work in 20 minutes when it normally takes you an hour and a half.
I did it in an hour. And my boss bought me coffee as a reward for being late (well, not quite how she put it)!

Today I almost lost my right thumb!

It was the Kitchen again. I've told you how it hates me. I was chopping onions. Slippery devils! I'm not sure if I told you but I bought Bruce a Magimix for Christmas. Though he is convinced onions taste different when you use it to chop them I've been secretly using it when he isn't home.Very, very sneaky! I did admit to him one Saturday but he didn't believe me. Apparently when his Dad and him were perfecting the Famous Family Peri-Peri recipe back in Australia they made a revolutionary discovery. Whenever they used the Magimix to chop the onions it gave the sauce a slightly different flavour that they didn't like. So onions were chopped by hand forever more.
Tonight I decide to oblige and use a knife to chop the onions I needed for the mince dish we were having for dinner. The result, I almost lost my thumb! I'm not exaggerating. I used the smaller, sharper chopping knife. Peeled the onions and started to chop. I'm not sure if it is because these onions are Scottish but they are decidedly more slippery than I remember Benoni onions being. Onion slipped away from knife, thumb went under and slice! Shock! Blood. Lots of blood. Cold Water. Pain. Roller Towel, pressure. Less pain. Blood soaked. Dancing around the kitchen holding towel over thumb shouting profanities not befitting a lady! More roller towel and sticky tape to hold it in place (Too much blood and no plaster big enough!). Onions in Magimix. Viola! Easy Peesy!

I'm now discovering how difficult life with an out of action thumb can be! I can type, thank your lucky stars but holding a pen could be hard. Trying to open a can of tomatoes is an endurance test! Even holding the wooden spoon to stir was less effective!
Feeling sorry for me? How long do you think I can milk this for? I will tell you one thing - I'm using the Magimix to chop onions from now on. My opposable appendages depend on it!

Life without TV

We have been without a TV for 12 days now. Normally I wouldn't really miss it but this week I've missed out on watching the Twenty20 World Cup, the Western Province vs. British and Irish Lions game and Bafana Bafana vs. Iraq. I don't profess to be a big time Sports fan but I there are a few things I like to support and this week my lack of TV denied me the opportunity. Getting updates via live sporting websites is too slow and stressful. And I'm convinced my support would have helped WP and Bafana Bafana win. Mark my words with a big tick next week when we get our TV back we'll win everything! My energy is a powerful thing! I think I may have jinxed us.

I must admit I do seem to have got a lot more things done with the absence of the people in the box. Important things like sleeping, housework, blogging, reading and sleeping. I lead an exciting life and in fact I must close of this most riveting blog as I've ironing to do.
Hope this week brings you happiness!

Drag me to Hell!

When was the last time you watched a good old fashioned Horror flick? The kind that made you jump out of your seat and scream - following up with a silly giggle while you rescued the popcorn drowning in your cleavage or mourn the demise of those that reached the floor?
We watched one last night- Drag me to Hell. It doesn't have the greatest storyline but all the stuff that makes for a good Horror is there. Creaking stairs, chandeliers that shiver at appropriate moments, curses, shadowy spirits, rusty gates that clang open and shut in the wind, power failures, torches that work intermittently and let's not forget the angry evil being with the glass shattering, lightening and fire summoning voice. Oh yes and the gross parts are there too - vomiting maggots and such things.
I sound like I'm scoffing but if the truth is to be told on this page today then I need to admit that I jumped, screamed and hid behind Bruce a few times. There are some ridiculous moments but I'll leave you to discover those for yourself.
Give it a watch if you like this sort of thing. There hasn't been a proper Horror film around for a while. At the very least you will be entertained.

Is there anybody out there?

I don't mind writing for myself at all but I'd like to think I'm entertaining somebody. I know of 3 people who read my blog - Miller, Hayley and my Man (said like Denzel Washington would say it). Anyone else?

I'm writing this on a train hoping the wireless internet connection doesn't fail on me and leave me quite literally without words. Just left Darlington station, next stop Newcastle. I'm looking out at green fields with scatterings of yellow flowers (that I'm yet to find out the name of) and enjoying the wee bit of sun shining through my window. I've found my place in the sun.

It's been a good weekend. I think I almost peed my pants laughing a few times. If you ever find yourself in a place called Whitby I can recommend the fish and chips! English style! We didn't get it wrapped in newspaper because we sat in but a tasty treat it was. I don't know how my Dad managed to squeeze in apple pie and custard afterwards but somewhere in those skinny legs lies a bottomless pit. Our poor waiter was subjected to my Sister's flirting and my Dad's sardonic humour but I left him a tip to help him pay to get his sanity back. Oh yes, lots of stairs and hills around town which led my Mom to declare - 'If there really is a stairway to Heaven I'm not going to make it up!'

Have a good week chaps!

In the land of Robin Hood honesty prevails

Finally a little time to blog and because I'm away. I've just been so busy lately. I'm in Whitby in Yorkshire with my Mom, Dad, Sister and her husband. I'm looking out at the rain, sipping on a G&T, my Mom and sister are playing Solitaire (I know it's meant to be a one player game but rules can be broken), Dad and Sister's Husband are talking economics, politics and chances of winning the lottery.

So here's a story that gave me a little faith in humanity. My Dad arrived this morning at Heathrow Airport, hopped on a tube to Kings Cross, then had to catch a train to meet us in Doncaster. He arrived safe and sound we met him with Starbucks and drove to Sister's In-laws for lunch. We alight happily from the motor vehicle and Mom says to Dad 'Didn't you bring your laptop?' I've never seen my Dad's face so white. A panicked search ensued but it was fruitless. Laptop sat alone on a train to Newcastle. Inside the laptop bag were all manner of valuables - Ipod Touch, return tickets to Italy, train tickets to London, passport and the list goes on.
A few phonecalls, a few unhelpful folk and then some very helpful ones and we were told they would try contact train but to call back in an hour and half. A very long wait with a lot of prayers being sent upstairs and good news was received. They had the laptop bag in Newcastle. Some honest soul found it and handed it in. Guardian Angels were smiling down on Dad.

So now we are settling down for dinner - Mom's lasagna! The best in the world! Yummy!
All is well in our world.